A Million Little Pieces

Hey there ,

Back in January of 2005, the first month of my sobriety, I read a book, A Million Little Pieces, by James Frey. Frey and his book had just been rocketed to instant celebrity by a gushing testimonial by Oprah over how much she loved the book and how badly each and every one of us needed to read it.

Just as quickly as he ascended he crashed and burned. His book, published as a memoir of his experience in rehab was revealed to be an elaborate exaggeration. Oprah rescinded her endorsement and he was publicly eviscerated, drawn and quartered, and his head posted on a pike outside the walls of Random House for all the world to see.

Well, not really, but it might have been kinder if they had.

If ever I get the chance to meet James Frey I will shake his hand and thank him for producing a work that, for me, was life changing. It saddens me that people get so hung up on details that they miss the importance and relevance of a work.

Whether or not Frey’s work is fiction or autobiographical doesn’t matter to me at all. What matters is that that book came into my life when I needed a mirror.

Yes, the details of his book were far uglier than what my experience was, but the principles were the same and in his story I could see my own face. He was a junky and his story left me with only one conclusion – I was a junky as well.

It was at this point I had a choice to make.

I could continue my decent into self loathing. I could give in to my own depression, my lack of self worth and the belief that this was the best I’d ever do.

Or, I could fight. I could recognize that every moment holds an opportunity for change.

I made the decision that my daughters deserved better.

I made the decision that my wife deserved better.

Finally, I made the decision that I deserved better.

For the past few days I’ve been telling you that you are perfect just as you are and that’s true. Too often we blind ourselves to our potential by believing that we have so much work to do before we can start.

That’s a delay tactic. That’s Low Self Esteem talking, that’s Insecurity, Self Loathing, Fear or any other form of what Steven Pressfield calls Resistance. Resistance is anything that gets in the way of doing your work.

We are all here to do work. You know this deep down. Your work is that passion that burns inside you. That thing that makes your pulse quicken. It might scare the crap out of you, but you also just can’t leave it alone.

The day I decided I was good enough on my own, without self medication, was the day I stepped out onto my true path. That was the day I started doing my work.

You are perfect, right now. You are ready to start your work, right now. There is nothing you need to do other than let you be you.

Don’t confuse yourself. You are not the things you do. You are so much more.

Allow yourself to be that which you already are.

To your perfect imperfection,


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Filed under Addiction, Drug Addiction, Empowerment, Ministry, Motivation, Perfect Imperfection, Personal Development, Recovery, Self Help, Strength

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